Can i grow out of it???

I'm vry worried! i'm scared!! I'm confused of what i want!! I'm not even sure i want that! Am i waisting my time? will i grow out of it??
I'm worried becoz the only reason i appelied for tmn Sea is bcoz sis is there!
I'm scared coz later i don get tmn sea and i need to go to BU4 !!
I'm totally confused bout what i truly want ...
I'm not even sure i wanna go to tmn sea if sis wasn't there!..What if i get in and she doesn't?? will i follow her to that school i really don wanna go??
Am i just wasting my time by applying for tmn sea??
Will i grow out of these Question eventually?? Help~ ARRR!!!!!!!!!!
Well after thinking ... i tot... WHO CARES:> i don like BU4 so just take tmn sea ...if she gets tmn sea and i don't ....does i really matter?? I'm finnaly Breaking free!!!~ And it feels DAMN awesome:>

Crazy?? Well That's me-jiawei:>